Every morning i wake up with the weight of the world on my shoulders and none of it feels real.. I keep having a vision of you walking towards me with a smile, and that was when i will smile, but my smile didn't last long for when my mum knock on my door, and told me it's breakfast, that my vision of you blurred and drift away from me.. What am i without you? I can't stand this constant loneliness.. I feel like i'm losing my mind. I just couldnt get back my other half -you. I am disturbed by the missing piece in me, which is you. I am out of ideas to make myself okay like I promised. I feel like i'm deeply wounded by the piece that has been cut out of me.I feel speechless and out of words by the sadness that is filling me. Last time, when you were still here, i thought that, sometimes life isn't fair, but I know you are there helping me get by, by giving me the strength to live on. Another sun sets. Another night falls. If only I could see you, I'd give my all
ARGH! LESLIE!! I have a terrible news for you.. Today, I received a letter from your dad, Mr Burke. In his letter, he wrote that P.T died in a car crash today.. It happened when your dad was bathing P.T and he suddenly ran away, and in the end he was crashed by a car.. Why must bad things happen and happen again?? I honestly can't take on any more blows! It seems that the magic is gone.. There is no more hope.. I wish that i could turn back time and do what i should do to prevent you and P.T from leaving.. Without you, my vision is clouded by tears in my eyes. I used to think that visions of us were my only paradise. And you know I miss you, Will my broken heart be healed soon? I feel overwhelmed in sadness and have become so consumed.. I don’t know how to say I wanna be with you, I don’t know how to start, but as each day goes by I wish you would come back. Sometimes I wish I could dream forever, dream of us being together and being the bestest pals, then that way we’ll always be together. Unfortunately though, I wake up, and I hate how reality always seems to suck. At school it’ll be just another day, another day that I try to pass trying not to think of you..
P.S Rest in peace, P.T, you'll always be in my heart and mind
It has been 5 months since you went... Each day seems unbearable for me go through without seeing you... A day without you is like a day wothout sunshine.. How I long to see you again, Leslie.. How I yearned for the past where we will play together with P.T.. Let me tell you the three things i did today- Miss you, miss you and miss you.. No offence Leslie, Each time I miss you, a star falls down from the sky. So, if you looked up at the sky and found it dark with no stars, it is all your fault. You made me miss you too much! I'm like a fish out of water without you. The reason it hurts so much to separate is very simple, it is because our souls are connected. You may be out of my sight… but never out of my mind… When I miss you, sometimes I listen to music or look at pictures of you, not to remind me of you but to make me feel as if I’m withyou. It makes me forget the distance and capture you. To me you are the sunshine in my life; without you the world is too dull for me to live in. I'm missing you... How i tried to forget the pain of missing you and thinking you, how i tried to get on in life living just like any normal child would- Happy.
Leslie... Leslie... Leslie... Your name keeps ringing in my head... I miss you so much.. The way I misses you..-It just can't be described.. Within you I lose myself...Without you I find myself wanting to be lost again.. If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden.. Like what William Cowper had said, "Absence from whom we love is worse than death, and frustrates hope severer than despair"... This is how I'm feeling right now.. It's undescribeable... After you left me, my heart is a ceaseless sermon of loneliness.. Now, I think about you constantly, whether it's with my mind or my heart, you're just deep inside me.. Leslie, I miss you.....♥♥
Missing you of late. It has really been very boring without you at Terabithia. May Belle is doing fine as the new Queen of Terabithia. Still I find that the original imagination of Terabithia is not there anymore. After all you were the one filled with the imagination to keep Terabithia going. Although you are not around anymore I still believe that your soul is still around us. Helping us and ensuring that life goes on as normal for us. I think that you will also be very sad if you know that we are still very despressed over your death. I believe you will also want us to carry on with life as normal. Terabithia faces fun, danger and excitement everyday! Still May Belle and myself are able to overcome all the dangers and make Terabithia peaceful!
Before I forgot, I have been watching hypnotising video lately to just hypnotise myself out of this weird world... Maybe it is a way of emoing so that i can escape from the fact that Leslie died... Here is one cool one.. I became 'drunk' after watching this video... And when i look at the back of my palm, I saw weird stuff running through my head.
I think it didn't really work, so I watched "How to be emo-by Nigahaga" But embeded code is disabled so go to youtube and watch if you want..
Now... It's the time... I should have a queen.. A queen for Terabithia.. I'm sure Leslie too wants something magical to happen again and not just die with her..It's the time, for me to bring May Belle, the person who had stayed with me and stood by me all along, from when Leslie was just a neighbour till now, when Leslie died. I have just accepted the fact that Leslie had died and she would be pleased for me to continue ruling Terabithia. Before, I was living in denial and couldn't accept the fact that Leslie died.. It seems so... FAKE! As though everyone is having me on... Why couldn't she just call me and tell me that she is fine? WHY!? WHY!? Tomorrow.. Will be the day... The special day... May Belle will be the new queen- The new queen of Terabithia. I'll build a bridge, a bridge that will only let people who are special see the magical world beyond. There, lies our late-queen body, where we shall pray to and who shall bless Terabithia to a newer place.
Leslie rest in peace.
This blog is created in memory of Leslie Burke!
-The Writer-